NObody is perfect

I want to share my experience with all of you about deliving my 2nd baby... I mean this experience is worth for all mothers (to be) even fathers too, cos I thought I should have done it before. I mean, I was confident that I will deliver Fazli normally. Meaning no c-sect or so. According to the history of delivering Farah through vagina, I thought it could also be the same way for Fazli. But I was wrong.

I was 110% prepared to deliver Fazli naturally and I did not pay much attention on to c-sect delivery at all. I thought as much anything worse could happen but I didn't take it seriously. So I did not really read thoroughly about c-sect delivery. And on the real day, I had to be cut in order to save both Fazli's and my life. So c-sect is the only way to get both of us out of danger, and later during the op the doctors found out an ectopic pregnancy at the other side of my womb. I have a bicornis womb (a heart shape womb, which is a hi risk pregnancy if one is pregnant. but we took the risk knowing the history of Farah, it was all OK)... It was a wonder how Fazli could live and survive at the other side of the womb untouched and healthy.

What I wanted to tell and share with you is, you should be prepared physically and mentally of the worst thing that could ever happen. I was not prepared mentally as well as physically to be operated. It was sort of hunting me day and night after the operation. I was under depression for weeks... So, the moral of the story is read thoroughly, ask your gynae whatever you need to know. You must be mentally strong especially, if you had to be operated. (take my case for instance...)


Mengapa? Tak percaya kah?

After 4 weeks of my delivery, I 'still' feel discomfort at the upper part of my stomach. (I had been complaining whilst my stay at the hospital but through the results of sonograph, it seemed to show nothing was wrong it me...) My gynae later sent me for CT because she said that it must've been 'something' else...

CT shows everything inside out... there it went... That moment I was told about a foreign object was left in my body during the c-sect, I was shaking and I cried a whole lot. Imagine, a gauze was left in my abdomen during the c-sect which I had earlier... You see, things like this should not happen, but it did happen...So on 8th May 08, I had to undergo another operation, which was a major one, to remove the gauze. They had my fresh wound reopened, made holes to give way to laporoscopy. Yet they still could not reach the foreign object, so this time they made a vertical incision as long as 15cm straight upwards to the upper part of the stomach. I had to stay at the ICU for 3 days cos I was not stable then. It was a bigger op and my body had to tolerate the op which was not an easy one and too much at one time.

There was a mixed feelings. I was so upset, depressed, disappointed... and most of all I lost my trust in all doctors since then. The germans claimed to be the best in medicine, yeah right... It was a trauma and I could not talk about it to anyone... But I'm ok now... I can talk to anyone about it...

The reason I'm telling you this is because I want you to tell the doctors (in case it's going to be a c-sect, which i hope not...) not to leave anything behind. ... Also this is a reminder to all friends out there... it can happen to anyone and we've heard a lot about it but I never thought it could happen to me. I was the victim...

OK, this is not to scare you... sorry if I did... didn't mean to scare you. Please tell any of yout friends if they were to undergo a surgery, tell their surgeons not to leave anything in their body! It's not surprising if it happens to anyone of us, because nobody is perfect...